We can all pretty much agree that being happy is an emotion that usually changes from day-to-day. One day you wake up, you feel great and everything seems to be going just your way. But what about the next day? Or to put this in comparison with the rave world, how do you usually feel once you get home after a festival? Studies have shown that more ravers are dealing with feelings of depression because they contrast so heavily with the feelings of love and acceptance that they felt during an event.
Sure, you might carry those feelings for a few days, weeks, maybe even a few months, but how long is your timer before you feel like you need to be at a rave to feel happy again? For many of us, raving is an outlet to allow us to be ourselves, love without fear, and explore our world the way we’d like to live in it. Then we go home, look through our pictures, and replay our memories over and over again so as not to forget a single detail of such an amazing week/weekend. But what happens when the memories start to fade? For most of us, we re-assimilate ourselves back into society, but never forgetting the knowledge of a better world that exists somewhere out there.
The folks over at Psychology Today have laid down a few tips to make the transition between rave world and the real world not so difficult. These tips will help you overcome day-to-day happiness and move head-on into life-long bliss.
Take Risks
If you go to festivals, you’ve already taken a huge risk and probably experienced the benefits that come with it. Never been to a festival, because you’ve heard they are dangerous? This tip is all about allowing yourself small amounts of anxiety and then overcoming them. For some, this is a daily challenge we have to face everyday. Let’s say you are out by yourself, and you’re afraid of looking like a loser with no friends. Talk to people, be friendly, overcome that anxiety. You are not only going to feel great for making a ton of new friends, but you’re also going to realize how silly your fears were. Happy people know that a little risk is healthy. I’m not saying go jump in front of a bus to get a rush, but stop caring about what people think so much and just enjoy yourself.
Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff
Ever notice when you’re in a bad mood, everything seems to bother you? Let’s say you’re having a bad day and the girl at the Starbucks counter is new and is taking a little longer than usual. You don’t say anything, but in your head you are thinking all these awful things about how she’s incompetent, and you’re going to be late. When in reality, she’s just doing the best she can. On the other hand, let’s say you are in a great mood that day and are enjoying the atmosphere, the smell of the coffee beans, and are so excited that you are starting your day off with your favorite caffeinated drink.
That’s the small stuff I’m talking about. Seriously, the difference between miserable and happy people is their thoughts. So, when you’re having a bad day, acknowledge it and do your very best to divert your thoughts away from negativity. Life is kind of like a Monet painting, looks wonderful from far away but up close is actually kind of shitty. Studies show that the happiest people aren’t the smartest, or most successful, they are usually just the people that are living their lives from day to day and not obsessing over trivial things.
Enjoy Your Friends Accomplishments as Much as Your Own
Imagine that you collect your friends, as well as their emotions. Usually, most of us are happy to lend a shoulder when our friends are unhappy. But what about their accomplishments? Have you ever had a friend that you stopped hanging out with because you were jealous of them always getting ahead while you were left behind?
Instead of thinking in that mentality, envision yourself sharing their accomplishments with them. Instead of feeling jealous, be glad that you’ve got a winner on your team. Obviously you are just as awesome, or they probably wouldn’t hang around with you. Remember, people of the same social status usually flock together. So stop with the pity party, realize how freakin’ incredible you are, and allow yourself to enjoy your friend’s moments.
Also, brain studies have shown that memories are made when people are retelling their accomplishments, so your friend will remember how cool you were about their accomplishment and will be much more willing to party with you when you score that date with your dream girl.
Let the Tears Flow When they Need To
A misconception about happy people is that they are never sad and a smile never leaves their face. It’s actually almost the complete opposite, happy people know how to be sad. They allow themselves to feel emotions when they need to. The worst thing you can do for yourself and for your happiness, is keep emotions in. If you feel like crying, then cry. Don’t feel like you need to be strong or be unemotional when things happen.
Allow yourself to be human, the quicker you let it out, the sooner you can hold onto happiness. Remember whatever you hold onto stays inside you, so let go of sadness. The only way to do that though, is to fully experience the emotion. When something happens, give yourself time to re cooperate. Also, surround yourself with a support system of good people that you trust. Allow them to be your rock when you are weak, it will bring you two closer and will help alleviate what’s troubling you.
Reward Yourself for Hard Work
Ever feel like you are drowning under a pile of things you don’t want to do? Of course, everyone gets stressed out from time to time, but the way to beat the feeling of being overwhelmed is to have a reward system. Let’s say you’ve got four big projects and you finish one, instead of worrying about how you are going to finish the other three, take time out to congratulate yourself on your hard work. Celebrate your accomplishments just like you were celebrating someone’s birthday.
If you achieve something you’ve been working hard for, make a big deal out of it. Pour yourself a huge glass of wine, go out for a beer, get everyone out to dinner, etc. Even for daily projects, if you reward yourself at the end of a long day, it makes it easier to enjoy those tedious tasks. If you don’t reward yourself, there is no light at the end of the tunnel. We’ve all had those days when something exciting is going to happen after work, and you can do it as soon as you finish what you need to do for the day. I’ll bet you zoom right through those projects.
However this goes both ways, don’t reward yourself when you haven’t worked hard. If you’ve promised yourself a piece of chocolate after your vigorous workout, but then you got busy and didn’t work out. If you eat the chocolate, you’ll end up feeling guilty and much worse about yourself. Wiz Khalifa said it best, “Work hard, play hard”.
Is there such a thing as being “too happy”?
This is something that I think a lot of ravers struggle with. You go to an event and you are so happy for those 3-5 days, that the other 360 days of being somewhat happy don’t even compare. Feeling extremely elated can turn into feeling extremely lonely later on down the road. So what to do? How do you find that perfect balance of happiness? Is there such a thing? Remember that you can find happiness anywhere, and just because it isn’t absolutely epic doesn’t mean it can’t make you happy. Try to stop comparing your experiences on a scale as to how they look to the outside world. Yes, maybe you aren’t skydiving every day or you aren’t meeting your favorite artist and getting to party with them. But maybe, you got to share a great laugh with your best friend today, maybe you went on a hike and found a ladybug on a rock.Happiness is a journey that is entirely up to you, and there is no set book on how to be happy. It’s all about your mind set, and how you enjoy your life.
Take pride in your accomplishments, and let your failures be a guide. Even if you have done everything wrong in the eyes of other people, it might be right for your life. And no one ever learned by doing everything the “right” way anyway, some of the world’s greatest endeavors have come from mistakes.
I personally hope this enlightens your mind, and gives you some ideas on ways to improve your well-being. I’d love to hear any comments, or tips of your own on how to succeed in being happy, please feel free to tweet, or e-mail me at: megan@whiteraverrafting.com.
Via Psychology Today
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