Letters to the Editor: We Don’t Have to be Best Friends

The open letter that WRR published this past Tuesday, subtitled “Let’s Consider The Bigger Picture,” began by explaining its inception.

Writer Wade Davis explains how the “viral image of two teens engaging in lude(sp?) sexual behavior at a festival” raised the question in his mind of whether the two teens’ behavior in itself was worse for the community than the picture showing their inappropriate actions. He then goes to state that the girl’s embarrassment could have been avoided if the people around her hadn’t taken pictures and put them on the web, and that by doing so, those folks contributed to the stigma that’s associated with our scene.

Now, I understand that Davis says that this is just a “microcosm of the growing problem overall,” according to his footnote, but this example sent three red flags going off in my head immediately, before I even got to the rest of the piece:

1. No blame should ever be placed on the individuals that document such unfortunate events. The bystanders didn’t ask to see these teens grope each other in front of them, nor did they invade the couple’s privacy to get these pictures. These teens were in a public space, and they chose to go ahead and do whatever they wanted – and as a result of, for better or for worse, the age of instantaneous digital documentation, there is now proof of that moment.

2. Nobody is responsible for the couple’s actions except for the couple themselves. Every festival has its share of um, “exhibitionists.” Crazy stuff happens at festivals – this is not a new fact. While I don’t believe she deserved that sort of Internet humiliation, I would hope that teenagers would be aware of the ramifications of acting that way in front of hundreds of their peers, all of whom have cell phones. As for the claim that the entire ordeal could have been avoided with a “thoughtful reaction,” I don’t believe the couple in question was being very thoughtful of the people around them at the time. (That being said, the people that snapped pics are kinda gross and should be ashamed of themselves).

3. The dance music ‘community’ is more than just ravers and festival goers. And the statement that these photos contribute to a stigma towards all of us is just really silly. Dance music has become huge across the globe, from the kid in Japan that’s never stepped inside a rave, listening on his laptop, to the Vegas socialite who has become sucked into the scene, surrounded by popular DJ residencies at every nightclub. Dance music isn’t just for the dance floor anymore.

Which brings me to my main point. Our love for dance music is what we have in common, but that doesn’t necessarily unite us. People need to treat one another, and themselves, with respect, of course. That’s just a given, something we’re taught by our parents from before we can understand speech.  However, grouping all dance music lovers into a single category is bliss ignorance, reserved for out-of-touch journalists covering the festival beat and not an action befitting of someone who writes for a dance music site. The dance music community is “ripping itself apart,” splintering – and for good reason. Different folks have different tastes, different priorities. We might all like dancing, but we don’t have to be best friends. We don’t have to be family, if we don’t want to be.

As much as I appreciate the whole concept of “PLUR” – the origins, the intended meaning – it’s a concept that is lost on a lot of people in the dance music community, myself included. The only times I’ve ever heard “PLUR” is when it’s been shouted at me by the drugged-out half naked girl that’s trying to shove past me to the front of the stage. It’s usually preceded by the words “You’re so not.” The phrase seems especially irrelevant to those of us that started listening to this music on the Internet, away from warehouse raves or shows or festivals (which makes up a pretty substantial part of the community, from what I can tell.) It’s all about losing yourself in the music for us, and everything else takes a backseat; from drugs to drunkards.

Honestly, let the kid wearing the “Sex, Drugs, and Dubstep” shirt do his thing. It’s of no consequence to anyone else but him. He might think it’s hilarious. Let the girl humping the tree do her thing – just don’t judge her, don’t tease her, don’t take pictures. Be polite. Her friends will (hopefully) take care of her.

On the other hand, Davis does encourage some really great, realistic ways that people can “make a difference.” Encouraging moderation and hydration is practical, and putting the phone away to take in the experience is phenomenal. These aren’t revolutionary concepts, but excellent pieces of advice. These are things that help keep the scene healthy, and they certainly don’t have to be published under the pretext of ways people in the dance music community can “make a difference.”

At the end of the day, it’s all about the music. How you choose to enjoy it is entirely your prerogative, but as with everything else in life DBAA (Don’t Be An Assole) applies. I applaud Wade for his unwavering dedication to posi vibes for all, as well as for taking the time and effort to pour his heart into this piece, but the cynic in me wouldn’t allow it to get away without bringing up some things to think about.

Post written by Noah Yoo. You can reach Noah by email at noah.yoo@nyu.edu or on twitter @hi_im_testudo.

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Read the post that started it all; “Let’s Consider The Bigger Picture” also “I’m 16 and I love EDM“

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